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INTRODUCTION Perhaps the only thing more staggering than the number of delightfully twisted English signs popping up each year is the spread of English itself. At the moment, roughly two-thirds of the people on the planet speak it as a first, second, or third language, and there are currently seventy-three nations (if you include commonwealths and crown dependencies) where English is officially used. It may not be much of a surprise that India has the world's largest English-speaking population with 350 millión, but few would guess that the Philippines has more than twice as many English speakers as Australiaor that China has at least four times as many English speakers as the United Kingdom; or that New Zealand, one of the more famous English-speaking nations, has only the world's twenty-ninth-largest English-speaking population - even Denmark has more citizens who can converse in English. Just as fascinating is the array of diversity within the English language. Wikipedia now lists 133 régiónál varieties of English (including twenty-eight just in the United Kingdom). There are alsó twelve